Phil 4: 4-8

Wednesday, January 28, 2015

Rhinestone Cowboys…or, uh…Cowgirls (?)

I am going to kick off this blog with a post that could end up getting me in trouble with a good number of potential readers, but it’s something that needs to be said.  Recently before Mass began, I found myself distracted by the pattern of many, many very fine scratches running perpendicular to the grain on the seat of the varnished wooden pew in front of us.  As I began to prepare myself for Mass, I wondered what on earth would have caused that.

After Mass, I asked my wife, Maggie, about it and as we talked, we came to the conclusion that it almost had to have been caused by someone sitting in the pew wearing fancy, rhinestone-studded jeans.  Each time they got up or sat down, the rhinestones slide across the pew.  Hence the title of this particular piece—(I don’t recall ever seeing a guy wearing this style of jeans.)  Now the wear and tear on the furniture is bad enough, but, wait!  There’s more, as the commercial says.

I will go out on a short limb here and suggest that the reason bling like rhinestones are added to things is to draw attention to whatever the bling is on.  The sparkle draws the eye’s attention—that seems to be pretty a straightforward conclusion.  Now, consider the fact that many men have a difficult enough time maintaining custody of their eyes without having sparkly behinds in front of them during a solemn ceremony.  Yes, it’s a man’s problem to contend with, and each of us needs to accept responsibility for it, but where does it all stop?  And although the sparkle-butt jeans aren’t perhaps as bad as low-cut spaghetti strap dresses and blouses, or as revealing as too-tight short shorts, they do draw attention to that part of the anatomy.

So, here’s a question for the rhinestone cowgirls:  In a place where we celebrate the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, a place where reverence and awe should be the rule, why would anyone want to draw attention to their derriere?  Every time we celebrate the Holy Eucharist, we are at a re-presentation of Jesus’ one sacrifice for all time at Calvary, a re-presentation of his unspeakable suffering and death for each and every one of us that He would do all over for any one of us. It’s not a basketball game or a concert—it’s the center of our faith.  The way we dress needs to reflect this, (and that goes for both genders).

There.  I said it.  God bless—have a great day!


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